I am studying NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) right now and I love it! I can sink into anything by Anthony Robbins as he is all about NLP. So this morning I read:
"The Meaning of a communication is the response you get"
In other words our communication is only as good as the responses we get - WOW! Powerful stuff! Those words really hit me this morning when I read them after my morning workout, sitting outside my favourite Starbucks.
Have you ever said something to someone that you thought was harmless, yet the response you got was unexpected, surprising and perhaps to you out of proportion? I know I have.
There are two main reasons this occurs:
1) Our communications are channelled through the unique filters others have - which means their "stuff". So if someone is sensitive to people who raise their voices, it will not matter what you say or what your intentions are, if you speak in a loud voice, they will not hear your communication.
"People will not remember what you say so much as how it made them feel" Maya Angelou
2) Your communication may not be as clean as you think - for example if you intend to praise someone and do it in an offhand kind of way they might think you are being false and respond accordingly
So what is the value in knowing this. Well when we do and when we can fully internalize this concept we are obliged to take full responsibility for our communications. This means we can no longer blame others for not listening or responding in the "wrong"way. Essentially there is no "wrong" way, there is simply how others respond.
What is the action we can take? We need to become acutely aware of the response to know if our communication was effective. If the response was not positive - reflect on why not, redo it or reinvent a new approach. Today, pay close attention to how others respond to your communication. The first step to change is awareness!
Enjoy this day...
No comments:
Post a Comment